Thumbs Ups and High Fives at the Haven

                Today was completely worthy of all thumbs up and high fives given. I’ll start with what may not seem like a thumbs up worthy moment. Naughty behavior has been an issue for us, as activities with 17 2-5 year olds will usually illicit. The issue of discipline has perplexed us as “No” only goes so far and time-outs aren’t enforced regularly enough to make sense to the kids. We’ve had several moments lately where shining moments of progress have appeared but today brought a concrete accomplishment. Sibu is an adorably mischievous child, who ran up to me screaming “Mama” today, alerting that he was feeling a little extra excited. He remained positive until after lunch, when he proceeded to hit Manthe in the head with a chalk eraser, threw a plastic chair at Tylo and hit Tylo with a large Lego square in the face. Witnessing all three things in such quick succession and realizing no was simply not going to cut it, I picked Sibu up and brought him to the far side of the room and sat him in a chair by himself explaining that since he did something hurtful he had to stay there in time-out for a minute. Surprisingly enough, he listened and when his time was up, he came over to me with sad eyes. Tylo was there and I asked Sibu to say sorry to him. The sweetest “sorry” with a long rolled “r” was given to Tylo and reciprocated with the same. I said good job and asked them to hold hands and be nice, which they did. They gave each other and me big smiles and were given high fives and thumbs up in return. I was pretty proud of Sibu for listening and for following through and playing nice. I know this wasn’t the most sophisticated way to discipline and may not point to giant leaps and bounds but it was certainly a step in the right direction.
               Now we’ll turn to the moment that definitely elicited an “aww” from me, brought to you by Cedriono, who we know as the sad one to whom our hearts always reach. Today, he was immediately playful, a sight that fills our hearts due to its rarity. The last two mornings, he has immediately come up to me and started to play. His favorite game is when I pick him up and he flops backwards so his head is close to the ground. The only problem with this game is that he gives no warning as to when he is going to become a limp noodle. Nonetheless, it puts a big smile on his face. After about 20 minutes of hanging on me and attempting to elicit laughs, he decided it was reading time. This usually begins with a story read to him, asking simple questions throughout (what color is this? Or Is that a dog?). I’ve found this just makes him shy and he will simply nod in reply. So today I let him flip the pages and point at things, all the while making sure I was watching by turning my face back towards the book if I talked to another little one. Our little process was wonderfully interrupted with the sweetest little voice uttering a simple phrase, “this is a cat”. Though my heart jumped and I beamed that he was finally comfortable enough with me and his surroundings to utter more than very quiet Xhosa phrases to himself, I kept it in and acted like it was normal. Shortly after that I heard the same regarding a dog and then a horse, even sliding in an “air-o-plane”. I gave him a big thumbs up and said “Good job, Cedie!” and he reciprocated with a big smile, hug and another story. Renee overheard me telling someone about a cat and inquired as to what I was talking about and when I relayed what Cedie had done, she beamed and explained how proud she was of him. I have to say I completely agree. I love the days when these adorable little monsters make us proud and these moments will certainly imprint their little faces in our hearts.

Hogsback

            Hogsback was our destination of choice for the long weekend. The town is sweet and sleepy with a fantastic view of mountains which are said to resemble the backs of hogs. We began our sojourn early Saturday morning and drove the 3.5 hours there without a hitch (minus being a bit nervous about winding mountain roads). I must say, driving on the left side of the road is entertaining. After checking into the first backpacker, Terra Khaya, and dropping our things off we decided to jump right in with a hike. The forest was breathtaking, albeit quite muddy, and the hike was even more fun with our added hiking companion, Trensin (I have no idea how to spell her name). We crossed a creek and ducked under trees and spider webs. When we came upon the first waterfall, Madonna and Child, we took a much needed breather and picture taking break. The rest of the hike was still beautiful as well as tiring with its 3.5 hour length. We got back to Away with the Fairies (the second backpacker we stayed at that also had the best hiking trails) and the keys managed to get locked in the trunk (I will mention that it wasn’t my typically clumsy self to blame). Almost all our money and all but one phone was locked away for the evening. We got a ride back to Terra Khaya and a locksmith came in the morning from 280 km away to help. We spent a relaxing morning at Terra Khaya after waking up for a mountain sunrise and proceeded to pack up and explore the town with its quaint artist shops, planning to come back and take a horseback ride through the mountain. However, an afternoon as relaxing as our morning wasn’t in store. A bump in the gravel road broke off a plastic cover underneath the car. Thankfully we were by a pottery studio/farm and the farmers helped us get the car on jacks and retrieve the dangling cover. Then a rock hit something else that proceeded to leak. The tires also ended up being low. We still went to two pottery stops and I got a great souvenir for my mom and Zach’s mom, which was an exciting find. Once we got to Away with the Fairies, we started to sort out car trouble. A group of siblings ended up having a miniature compressor to pump our tires at least a little and another couple who we’d met the night before helped inspect the leakage, which turned out to be nothing.  We had a relaxing evening after we stopped worrying about the car. We ate some of the best pizza ever and played six-person cribbage with the family who had helped with the tires (they were way faster learners than I was).

             We woke up bright and early to watch the sunrise again and embarked on a “2 hour” hike. We made our way back to Madonna and Child and on our way back decided to explore Bridal Veil Falls. When the sign said “rock scramble, 20 mins” it really wasn’t lying. The strenuous and steep climb was entirely worth it when we came upon the middle of the fall and ventured out to take pictures. On our way down, Heather slipped but we thought nothing of it till her toe was all of a sudden quite bloody. We carefully and precariously plopped down on a rock to inspect the slice that ended up being halfway around her toe. Thankfully she had brought her first aid kit and I fixed her up well enough to make it back and re-bandage it. I hate to say that such a mishap was fun, but it was a little exhilarating to be doctoring in the middle of a rock scramble. Cut feet and all, the hike ended up being over 4.5 hours and boy do we feel it. The scenery, which there will be a lot of on Facebook, was simply gorgeous and made the work well worth it. The drive back was uneventful, thankfully and Avis didn’t charge us for the broken cover. So despite the quite stressful (at the time) car troubles and slight injury, the weekend could legitimately be called a success. Being in the mountains is always so refreshing and hiking through nature’s beauty was a blessing in muddy tennis shoes.

Surfing in Jeffrey's Bay

            Flat 14 embarked on our first road trip today, Jeffrey’s Bay the location of choice. The drive was absolutely gorgeous, winding between cliffs of pine with sudden vistas of river valleys flashing past too fast for a camera to capture. Arriving a little too early to the backpacker from which we would embark on our very first surfing lessons, we lounged around on picnic tables observing our first backpacker and watching the surf. When the time came the wetsuits were scrunched on and boards were loaded up and the trek to the beach was made. The classic land lesson first, water lesson next format was followed, great relief being found when we realized we would only be in up our waist in water. Rather than bore with the details of how we learned, I’ll skip to the chase. I stood up! A lot! (There are pictures on Facebook.) It was so much fun all I could do was smile. Add to that the surprise that my usually clumsy self could actually surf, and I was ecstatic.

            We were a tired bunch after our lesson but decided to walk the beach to find shells, which turned out to be a great decision. The beach was one of the best shell beaches I’ve seen in a long time and climbing over rocks was a picturesque moment. Surprisingly enough, I stopped for a cheesy moment and wrote “I <3 Zach” in the sand and took a dually cheesy picture. When we had satisfied our beach wanderings, we explored the shops in town and had a bite to eat. The afternoon ended with a successful drive home. Overall, the day was a memorable one. My first road trip in a foreign country and surfing successfully all in one day makes for a good one in my books.

Frontier Weekend

Day 1

            We began our sojourn into the Winterberg Mountains in Shaddly’s bus. Taylor and I sat in front, which holds a twofold benefit; we didn’t get carsick and we got to learn a little more about the beautiful mountains we were driving through. The scenery was striking as we wound up the mountains, with the occasional 20-minute stop for construction. It was put to shame when we arrived on the first of two farms, tucked into impressive poplar trees and lush bushes. We were provided a nice lunch and told that we were entering the realm of real South African farmers as their houseguests. We then milked a cow and drank straight from the utter after we fed an Eland housed in the same pasture as my ever-favorite horses. We were taken on bakkies (trucks with bars to hold standing people in the bed of the truck) on a bumpy road to a place that utterly took my breath away. We climbed a massive, rounded rock face to awing views of the Winterberg Mountains. A swim in the river beneath this rock was refreshing and exhilarating.

            After such an exciting afternoon, the group sat beneath trees and had a glass of wine by the fire. Laura and I got to thank Winnie and hear the story of how she and her husband, Marnus, began housing students for an orientation to South African farming. These people were so generous to open their homes to us (even letting me send Zach a message on Facebook as there was no service and I didn’t want him to worry). The dinner was authentically Afrikaans and consisted of a delightful pumpkin dish which will be made very soon in Flat 14.

            After dinner, we were taken to the second farm and the house we were to sleep in. The house was the farmer’s sons and had been his great grandmothers. It is reminiscent of the times in which it was built, the 1940s. In both houses on this farm I felt my grandmother and grandfather there. Grandmother would have adored the kitchens and the office and bar areas were right up my Grandfather’s alley. The living rooms in both houses were strikingly Aunt Ruth Anne.  The son whose home we stayed in and who showed us around the property and shot little 22’s with us on Saturday was so much like cousin Ed I had to laugh. I thoroughly enjoyed being reminded so heavily of family this weekend.

Day 2

            Crisp mornings are always my favorite, with the sunshine peeking through a layer of clouds and settling on the soft dew to create a atmosphere of complete harmony. Saturday morning provided that much-desired feeling with a little flavor of Africa. Breakfast was an affair to behold; looking out onto breathtaking gardens my mother would have had a heart attack over (don’t worry Mom, I took pictures of the roses for you). Memories of gardening with Mom were a fun treat with breakfast.
            A little less breathtaking were the sheep being shorn for our viewing and educational pleasure. However, the sound of a sheep baaing is hilariously similar to an imitation of the same done by a human. Following the sheep experience, we were taken up the mountain in our favorite, the bakkie. We hiked up a portion of the mountain, and each time we came to a peak, there was another to climb. The exertion was completely worth it when we got to the top for great photo-ops and gorgeous views of the Winterbergs.

            Saturday afternoon hosted tennis with an Eland overlooking the players, tea with delicious deserts, and target practice with 22’s. Dinner was delicious as the other meals had all been. By the end of the day, the group was exhausted and ready for a good sleep.

Day 3 

            Bumped and bruised, we began our last day of the Frontier Weekend. We flew down the mountain in the back of a 4x4 to the beginning of a trail leading to a dried-up waterfall. This sounds unimpressive, but the scenery was yet again, inspiring. We came upon two cliffs, approximately 30 feet apart and at least that much high. Stepping over the rocks and swimming through the river, albeit scary, was worth the fright when we all climbed up the waterfall and captured images that we will never forget. When else are we going to hike and swim to a waterfall and clamber up the same to take a giant group picture…in Africa. So bumped, bruised, and tired, we returned to Port Elizabeth enriched with how a real South African farmer lives.

Little Adults

            We are working with little people. They are complex individuals despite their small statures and cherub like faces. It’s sometimes hard to treat children like they are equals but treating them as little adults gives them confidence and fosters more open connection. Children feel empowered when they are given respect and are treated not as if they are toddlers without much independent thought. Obviously this does not mean we should treat toddlers as though they don’t have needs specific to their age or as though they don’t need a few extra hugs when they fall off the slide. But when you work with kids like they are your friends rather than like you are solely their caregiver, they are empowered. 

             We took the kids outside to play in the courtyard that houses the swings, slides, and teeter-totters. Some of the children take to the play equipment like peanut butter to jelly. Others need a little encouragement. Others still are unfamiliar with what on earth a slide is. It’s a simple thing to show a child how to use a slide and how to maneuver the teeter-totter. But this simple action allows them to have fun with something new. They’ve now gained a new skill (they are after all, in playschool). They are then more confident. Beyond teaching them how to use a swing, some of the children need help playing with other children. Cedriono, the boy who finally smiled on the first day, has trouble playing with other kids. He is extremely shy and reserved and seems to be perpetually down. But show Cedri (as the other kids call him) how to swing on a swing and then bring another shy child to swing on the bench swing with him, and he will give you a smile. He’ll start to swing himself, maybe even talk a little bit. All he needs is a little push to be more confident. By treating him like he is your friend and bringing another little one into the situation, he feels empowered to play with other children and smile while doing it.